Since the last time I wrote to you, I have lost a dear family member and have been in mourning. I have been a bit frozen in time as my whole family has been held by the beautiful mourning rituals and practices in our tradition, and the attention and care of dear friends, extended family members, and our communities.
Interestingly, the names of these mourning practices are actually numbers. The name of the practice of Shiva / שבעה is derived from the number seven, the number of days that mourners stay at home and receive members of the community.* Additionally, the name Shloshim / שלושים is the Hebrew number thirty and connotes the first thirty days following burial, when mourners continue to forgo certain everyday activities.
Numbers relate to counting and measuring, and they are very concrete and of this world. I love numbers. I was actually admitted to the School of Engineering at the University of Michigan when I attended college, and continued as a math major for a couple of years before I ended up with a degree in history. But, I still love numbers. I find comfort in the reliability, steadiness and concrete nature of numbers, similar to the way that I find comfort in the steadiness and concrete presence of the trees in my yard and to the bones in my body. A three is a three. A tree is a tree. A bone is a bone. A breath is a breath. Numbers ground me in rhythms of time, counting and physicality as we live in this world of Action (Assiya / עֲשִׂיָּה) and Nature (Teva / טֶבַע).
Each year, as we enter the season that approaches the darkest time of year and the holiday of Hanukkah, the texts and teachings that I'm currently studying appear to me in my body, both in stillness and in movement. And this year especially, I notice that paying attention to detailed, numbered, counted aspects of my breath, my body, my steps as I walk, my strokes as I swim; and in general to this world of nature and physicality, is grounding and useful to me in my grief. Returning to concrete rituals of sitting and embodied practice every day has always helped me to stay present with my heart and my feelings.
And when I sit long enough with attention placed upon the breath, the body, the world of nature surrounding me, the physical, I feel the living essence that animates and enlivens all life. This world is illuminated from within by the world of the spiritual, and thus for the time we spend on this earth, we are all living beings, Nefesh Chaya / נֶ֥פֶשׁ חַיָּֽה. (Genesis 2:7)
When we kindle the lights of Hanukkah, we activate the ever-present and ever-renewing miracle of illumination in dark times. We reconnect with the first spark of creation and remember that each day brings its own point of illumination, a new invitation to connect with the holiness within and around us.
As we enter this season, I invite you to take a moment to listen inward, soften, and awaken this light in your own body with these offerings, created to help you move gently into this time of reflection and rededication.
1. Extended Embodied Practice | Points of Illumination in the Body
A spacious Yoga and movement practice (45 minutes) offered through the IJS Online Yoga Studio.
2. Short audio teaching | Nekudah Hitoreret / Point of Illumination
A brief teaching on illuminating difficult or tender places in our bodies and lives, as they relate to the story of Joseph.
You can find both offerings, along with additional teachings on light and rest, on our Embodying Hanukkah page.
May these practices support you in sensing your own inner flame and the small but powerful ways it continues to shine. With our whole beings, may we awaken, uplift, and shine forth these holy sparks for our world, and remember the positive impact that our actions may have.